Shadows

They say life in the real world begins when you finish university. I've been struggling to find this 'real world' that is spoken of. In search of this, I have found myself on the other side of the country, back home, and now in Ottawa. Thus far my search for the real world has uncovered nothing but feelings of doubt, loneliness, and uncertainty....a feeling of being lost.

For a period of my life recently, a new month meant a new province. A new province meant a new city to learn, new bus routes to get lost on, the now familiar streets full of strange faces. Along with new expectations and opportunities came the doubts, insecurities, and sleepless nights that seem to follow me wherever I go, like a shadow.

I guess the question is.....what IS the real world? How do I find it. Will I even know what this real world is, if or when I find it? I'm beginning to think that maybe I left my real world behind when I decided to pack up my life and jump on that plane. If great friends, family, fun, and love are it, then I guess I did.

I hope I can soon outrun these shadows that have been following me around these past few months. When I do, I know I've finally found my real world.